Everyone has heard of “Bushisms“, the often stupid remarks made by George W Bush - such gems as “It’s clearly a budget. It’s got a lot of numbers in it” - but, until now, Brownisms have been missed. What is a Brownism?
Definition of Brownism: (braun’i(z’?m)
1. (verb) The subtle art of combining of words into sentences that are meant to deliberately mislead or confuse the general public.
Origins: A term coined to categorize all of Prime Minister Brown’s eccentric speech.
Example: A sample Brownism: “This will be a government of no spin.”
Notes: See also: Spin doctor; Machiavellian; dishonest.
And below, courtesy of Hertfordshire CF, is a list of the 20 best Brownisms:
20. “I will not allow house prices to get out of control and put at risk the sustainability of the future… the UK should not return to the instability, speculation and negative equity of the 1980s and 1990s” Gordon Brown, Chancellor of the Exchequer, November 1997
- Strangely enough, the UK housing market now faces years of instability and negative equity after the former Chancellor allowed rampant speculation to cause house prices to spiral out of control for 10 yrs.
19. “I am happy for there to be a leadership contest. I think there should be.” Gordon Brown, Interview with BBC’s Sunday AM, 10th Sept 2006.
- As everyone knows there was of course no leadership contest. The Prime Minister should be careful what he wishes for though, as he may well get his leadership contest over the next few months.
18. “I did maths for a year at university. I don’t think I was very good at it. And some people would say it shows.” Gordon Brown, April 2007
- It certainly does Prime Minister. A surprisingly candid admission from a man who lost $9 billion on his gold sales and then ran our economy for ten years, leaving just before the banking and housing sectors collapsed.
17. “The failure to support the reform treaty will leave the Czechoslovakian people isolated in Europe.” Gordon Brown, March 2008
- Looks like Geography wasn’t Gordon Brown’s strong point either. Our Prime Minister states his fears in Parliament for Czechoslovakia, a country that ceased to exist 15 years ago.
16. “There is nothing that you could say to me now that I could ever believe.” Gordon Brown to Tony Blair in October 2004, after British Prime Minister appeared to renege on a guarantee not to fight a third term of government.
- Prime Minister, trusts us we know how you feel. That’s how we feel about you both.
15. “The Arctic Monkeys really wake you up in the morning.” Gordon Brown on the Sheffield band, quoted in 2006 summer issue of New Woman magazine.
- Our Prime Minister’s reply when asked about his favourite music band. He was then embarrassingly unable to name a single track from their debut album beyond insisting that ‘they are very loud’.
14. “I hope the Spice Girls will come back, although it may be beyond even Bob Geldof to get that to happen.” Gordon Brown, June 2005
- The Prime Minister reveals his favourite pop group. He also realised that despite being one of the most powerful men in the world, there are just some things you can’t have, even if you are friends with Sir Bob.
13. “To those who feel Westminster is a distant place and politics simply a spectator sport: I will strive to earn your trust.” Gordon Brown acceptance speech, May 2007
- Only a few months later, in November 2007, Gordon Brown admitted that the Labour Party had received £600,000 in donations which “could not be justified”, were “completely unacceptable” and “were not lawfully declared”.
12. “And to honour those who raised us, I can affirm our commitment to restore the link between the Basic State Pension and earnings.” Gordon Brown, Labour Party Annual Conference Speech 2007
- This was after Gordon Brown deliberately ignored warnings to push through pension tax changes in his first Budget in 1997. Officials admit that it cost pension funds up to £75 billion and made millions of pensioners worse off. Interestingly, he has just withdrawn the 10% income tax band which will further hit pensioners hard. I bet pensioners across the UK wish that the PM would stop ‘honouring’ them now.
11. “…a small number of hybrid vehicles with virtually no emissions will be exempt altogether through a zero-rated car tax.” Gordon Brown promises no road tax on low-polluting cars in his March 2006 Budget
- In a spectacular display of smoke and mirrors, the former Chancellor actually promised a tax cut! Unfortunately officials later admitted to the Times, that not a single car in the UK would qualify for this zero-rated road tax.
10. “It is about a different type of politics, a more open and honest dialogue.” Gordon Brown, June 2007
- Apparently under Gordon Brown, we would have a government with “no spin”. We learn now that the Prime Minister is spending more on spin than Tony Blair whilst he was in office. Currently he is paying nearly £2million on personal advisers alone. His team includes Stephen Carter, the former chief executive of Brunswick, one of the world’s leading PR companies.
9. “No more boom and bust.” The former Chancellor, Gordon Brown, BBC Election website, 1997
- The Prime Minister’s words come back to haunt him now as the economic boom goes bust.
8. “I believe that by the end of the year the British forces that have been 5,500 can be reduced to 4,500.” Gordon Brown re-releases old news of troop cuts he had already promised in Summer 2007 just prior to the election that never was in Oct 2007.
- The Prime Minister learns how easy it is to generate headlines by re-releasing the same story over and over again. On a BBC interview with Jeremy Paxman, the Defence Minister later admitted 500 of these troop cuts had already been promised back in Summer 2007 and the other 500 troops were still in Germany awaiting deployment.
7. “Factories: not recommended. Early starts and monotonous work.” From Gordon Brown’s ‘How to scrounge off the State’ Political Manifesto released during his earlier days as a Labour party activist
- Pearls of wisdom from the Prime Minister, as he advises British workers to avoid working in factories. Could this be why British manufacturing declined so quickly under the former Chancellor?
6. “If you’re caught by police while working any scam, don’t worry. You may think you are guilty but legal advice can show otherwise.” Surprisingly the thoughts of the young Gordon Brown again in his ‘How to scrounge off the State’ Political Manifesto
- Reassuring words from our Prime Minister at a time when his own deputy Party Leader, Harriet Harman, had to wear body armour to tour her own South London constituency of Peckham. Even the Home Secretary, Jacqui Smith, admitted that she did not feel safe walking home in London at night. This was a government that promised to be “tough on crime”.
5. “I lied. I lied. My credibility will be in shreds. I lied. If this gets out, I’ll be destroyed.” Gordon Brown quoted directly by Andrew Rawnsley in his book ‘Servants of the people’.
- Gordon Brown words after he lied in the national media, by denying knowledge of Bernie Ecclestone’s donations on the Today programme, Nov 1997. Interestingly Gordon Brown has never denied this quote. He needn’t had worried though, his lack of credibility didn’t stop him becoming Prime Minister.
4. “The manner of his departure became the true measure of the man.” Gordon Brown in reference to Robin Cook’s resignation
- Strangely, the Prime Minister doesn’t think these words apply to his own departure though. With many of his own MPs joining the British public in calling for his resignation, Gordon Brown does not seem keen to demonstrate his own ‘true measure’.
3. “Counter-information is the key to success.” Gordon Brown as young Labour party activist, as quoted in the Daily Mail’s expose on his ‘How to scrounge off the State’ Political Manifesto, 2006
- The words of the same Prime Minister who promised us a spin-free government. Gordon Brown managed to create a whole new industry of spin doctoring and media manipulation with the New Labour project.
2. “I don’t like to use the phrase running commentary, but in this case I am not going to give a running commentary.” Gordon Brown, Daily AM Lobby Briefing 5 March 2008
- Upon hearing that he had been submitted to the Guinness Book of Records by Hertfordshire Conservative Future, as the world’s worst Rogue Trader for losing over US $9billion on his disastrous Gold sales. These spectacular losses continue to soar with the rising gold price. It is widely known that Gordon Brown acted against the advice of the Bank of England and City experts when selling this gold. The Treasury however, continues to suppress these documents despite being asked to release them during Parliamentary questioning by Peter Lilley, MP, in March 2008.
1. “Girls are advised to work as go-go girls.” Gordon Brown as quoted in the Daily Mail ‘How to scrounge off the State’ article
It seems as if Gordon Brown and Peter Stringfellow share much more than the same taste in fashion. As bizarre as it seems, our Prime Minister believes that the modern woman’s place should actually be in Spearmint Rhino and not the boardroom. Any comment, Prime Minister?
Brownisms: the new Bushisms. Only less amusing and more lying.
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This is what I think about the Royal bank of scotland. RBS boss Fred goodwin should be stripped of the pension he doesn’t deserve. If they pay him a profit related percentage he will get minus figures. Taking away his pension is the best option.